Anxiety a.k.a The Great Perhaps

I’m sitting at my local café, looking at an Ikea catalog and getting inspiration for how I might decorate my apartment. I’m thinking about getting some new pictures and a bookcase. I have no bookcase. My many, many books are piled and stacked against the wall of my living room. It’s not pretty. It used to have some sort of chaotic charm to it. But then the stacks got tipped and books just spilled all over the floor.

So yeah. I need to do something about that.

But it’s a moot point for the moment. My plane for New York leaves in less than 18 hours.

I figure this need to decorate the apartment is my coping mechanism against the great unknown which I’ll find myself in very soon. I get a sinking feeling in my stomach; a mixture of excitement and anxiety, when I think about where I’ll be this time next week.

Some people clean when they feel this way. I trawl through Ikea’s website and the sites of any other furniture outlet I know of (and I know quite a few).

I can’t believe how many times I’ve said goodbye in the past week. It’s weird. It’s hard. And I can’t help but look forward to just be on the plane, flying away from everything. Away to the great and wonderful ‘perhaps’ that is my future.

See you in 4 months, Denmark.